a fun tale.

ROCKS.

Are fascinating things, as surfers we need them to create our waves and our shorelines, but sometimes we don’t need them, especially when they bite you.

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At Burleigh the rocks are of the[volcanicus tigerclawus] variety, after meeting with the rocks at the big B you look like you have been in the tiger cage at Dreamworld with a big T-bone tied to your legs, just ask Ronnie Williams he will tell you all about them. Rocks can also be beneficial to us as surfers they create some awesome bottom formations at surfspots all over the world. Where would Dee Why[ horrendus doubleuppus], Avalon[ thickus slabbus], and the Bower[ barnaclus laceratus] be without rocks, oh yeah we need them, even though they hurt us so much, sounds a lot like women doesn’t it . Most of the time rocks are just downright dangerous, ever jumped off at Currumbin [Razorus slashus] in a big swell talk about razors, they cut you up like some homey on crack, just ask Tony Dempsey, he looked like he had done ten rounds with Mike Tyson after Currumbin had finished with him. I’m sure you all have your rock jump off horror stories, but that’s just what I am saying, they are bloody dangerous. One of the favourite pastimes of the crew at Burleigh is to watch the unsuspecting gumbies as they attempt to jump off the heaviest part of the point. Shit some of them are just pure carnage, but its not all fun and games for the crew, many a time I’ve had to ditch my board to help an unwilling participant, if only to save their lives as sometimes it can be life threatening. I’ve seen many an ambulance take an unsuspecting victim to the emergency ward. Now I’m not saying I’m immune to the dreaded tiger claw of Burleigh, I have left my fair share of skin on those filthy rocks, bailing my board and floundering over the rocks to safety, no, no one is safe from the dreaded rock jump off. When jumping off heavy rock jumps always have an escape route planned, whether that means tossing your board and jumping over 6ft of whitewater or a quick escape route back up the rocks, but don’t ever turn your back on it, or it will slap you down like a bitch. Always be prepared to bail because no matter how many times you jump off the same spot one day it’s gunna get ya. So no matter how much we need the rocks to create our beautiful surf spots, at times they will hurt us so be careful next time your mate says ” I know a really easy spot to jump off “, be afraid be very afraid. Don’t follow that crazed local with a gleam in his eye he will take you to the heaviest spot on the point and proceed to laugh his head off as you get smashed to bits, no always trust your own instinct. If possible paddle from the beach it is a lot safer than jumping off the rocks, why even people on jet ski’s have to fear the rocks as was seen at d-bah in a big swell once, rider and ski deposited on the rocks at lovers. Snapper, Kirra and Currumbin all have similar rocks, [Razorus sharpus], where as Burleigh has [volcanicus tigerclawus] as mentioned earlier, there are all types of rocks in our world, some good, some bad, only you can decide, be careful till next time we meet, watch the rocks.Dwayne’s World 3/08/2001.  

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